Stories

The Electric Jailhouse Acid Test – Ted Prokash

Another nice thing about my stay at the Napawaupee County jail was that I finally learned how to do acid properly. The opportunity arose quite by chance.

 

It was in the spring, some time after Tim, formerly a king of the Latin Kings of Chicago, had joined the team, a week or two after Josh Schlotzsky had taken his dressing down from big Dave. Josh survived the incident without any noticeable hit to his self-image.

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Art

Two Poems – A. Molotkov

Hesitation

 

if I take the jar inside

the water will spill

but how do I know this?

 

I forgot my own future

when I became engulfed in you

so much darkness

outside your well-lit room

I remain in the dark

 

if you let me shiver at the door

and freeze to death

as the jar freezes

 

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Columns

Daily Mainichi News Wire – Sprague Dawley

Ivanka Trump Invites Nuremburg Barbie To Gitmo Black Ops Bukkake Shooting.

–USA Today–

Nuremburg Barbie has taken time out from her tequila-soaked defection in Mexico to make her way via underground tunnels to Gitmo with the express purpose of rendezvouzing with President Trump’s beautiful, beautiful daughter Ivanka Trump in order for the pair to take part in a highly classified US military black ops bukkake film shooting.

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Stories

I Quit – Homeless

            “I quit,” The President said.
            “You quit?” The Vice President said.
            “I quit,” The President said again.
            “You can’t be serious?”
            The President, soon to be ex-President, took a bite out of his Big Mac, forcing shredded lettuce to fall from his mouth like beautiful greasy comets, or like small greasy people leaping from the burning building of his hungry mouth.
            The President was a large man and chewed accordingly,

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