Author Topic: Daily Mainichi News Wire  (Read 25 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Sprague Dawley

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 29
  • Fences: 0
    • View Profile
Daily Mainichi News Wire
« on: May 15, 2018, 01:58:47 AM »
Japanese Prince, Aged 11, Declares Himself “Ready” for Japan’s Throne

--Japan Times—

Japan’s Prince Hisahito, aged 11, and 3rd in line to the Japanese throne, has declared himself “ready” to be the next Emperor of Japan. “I’ve finished my homework and already had my first wank just last week. That means I’m ready for the Iron Throne. Plus I’ve seen all the nudie books down at 7-11. I know what the fuck I’m doing here.”


“If I fuck you up the arse is it still incest?”
--The Prince (centre) walking with his sisters.

“First order of business will be getting myself a big fucking samurai sword to behead all of my wanker siblings” continued the Prince, safely out of earshot of his 2 sisters. “Cutting out the competition is crucial to ensuring my reign is long and prosperous. After the public executions, next order of business will be to secure the last remaining Pokemon cards that I don’t already have. I’ll send some minion fuckhead serf door-to-door to make the required collections. After those 2 key strategic goals have been attained, the rest of my reign will be fairly straight-forward, my days mainly centred around fucking bitches and eating lollies.”


“Phew. That was awesome. The ol' in and out. Still not incest right? That was pretty much just like in the mags down at 7-11. Maybe even racier. Now then, let’s head home, I can’t wait to show you my big shiny samurai sword. It's just like my cock, that being, I’ve polished the fucken thing until it shines.”

"We are here on earth to fart around and don't let anyone tell you different."
-K.Vonnegut