Clown – Evelyn Winters

March 27, 2026

Her work commute was quiet, full of red lights shining down at her like a strained eye that suffered a long devilish night.
She walked into work and into her office.
The phone rang. She picked it up but said nothing. There seemed to be only breathing on the other end. She hung up the phone and sat down at her desk.

Carl from accounting came in and told her about the Gregs. The Gregs were two guys. Both named Greg. Carl told her good luck before he left. She smiled and waved.

The Gregs were full of enthusiasm for themselves. They loved what they did and loved when other people wasted their services and personal time on them.
But she didn’t say anything to the Gregs.

The Gregs didn’t know what to think. Baffled, they walked out, shaking their heads.

Carl came in and kissed her on the lips. She was used to this. Since they were dating. He congratulated her on her implied success. He was being overly optimistic. She shut the door and made him sit in her seat. He looked surprised, with a crooked smile.
She straddled Carl on the chair, and they kissed some more, passionately.

For lunch she left her belongings on her desk. She walked through the parking lot to the circus across the street. On New Mexicoland Drive. There was a sign on a big wood board that said, HIRING CLOWN ASAP.

She waved to a little woman.
The woman led her to a tent where she put on clown makeup and a clown costume with large red shoes.
She walked through the hall of mirrors, seeing herself from front, side, side, and behind. She honked her nose. The little woman smiled.

She found herself center stage driving a little car packed with other clowns. They were throwing candy out to the children. But when the children reached down to nab a treat, a clown drenched them with a squirt gun that was disguised as a bouquet of flowers.

She traveled with the circus from state to state. It was always surprising to see the people laugh at everything she did. She tripped over her big shoes.
She pulled down the lion tamer’s pants.
She swung from the trapeze bar until it stopped swinging, flailed around as if she were frightened.
But she was never scared.
*

When destruction came, the wind was blowing the tent, and the fire was burning the seats, and all the animals scattered to the big cave in the canyon.
She hid with the animals but could only see their glowing eyes in the dark.

After three days the air was calm. When she turned to look back at the cave all she found were large skulls and ribcages and thick bones piled in a heap of white light.

She set about to find people.
She walked through the desert, leaving large clown shoe tracks wherever she roamed.

The grocery store had some broken mannequins, but they didn’t smile at her. Not even once.

The park had a nice picnic table with rotten apples and smelly fish. She touched the eye of one fish. But the eye didn’t blink.

She went into the ocean and with her big shoes swam around in circles, hoping to gain a solution or an answer to her existence.

On a boat she set sail to an island of coconuts and little weaselly creatures. But they all scurried away when she came to shore.

She dreamed of the Gregs. They were in her old office honking her red nose and stomping on her desk. She took the Gregs and sat them in her seat one by one. When she kissed them she left her clown makeup all over their faces. Now they were clowns like her.

She woke and set sail. But the boat sprung a leak. It sank to the bottom where there was a treasure chest full of gold coins. She laughed, little bubbles floating to the surface.
*

The sky was gray. The sun, blotted out. There were no birds. There were no colors.

The tracks she left in the sand (now a large rock) were discovered by a black bear that stood upright like a man.

The bear placed his paw up to it. Sizing it. The bear chuckled. Perhaps there was a perceived absurdity.
The black bear moved onto the berry bush, where his lover was gorging herself, red berry juice dripping from her chin.