Excerpt From Jesus Freak – Cletus Crow
December 4, 2024
Genesis
God could say go to Hell
and you would.
This is why He’s careful
not to enter
heated conversations.
God has big and many ears.
I hope He’s listening.
Exodus
Parting the Red Sea
is a fantastic euphemism.
Moses was a murderer
who became God’s prophet.
I won’t always be
some perverted ass.
Leviticus
It’s hilarious
when you’re called a faggot
for having a nose ring
and you are one.
I’d never rape an angel
or anybody
but sometimes I wish God
would burn this city.
Numbers
My genealogy consists
of rednecks on father’s side
and mom is Irish.
If the only beer in the world
was donkey piss
I’d begrudgingly drink donkey piss.
It took me years
to realize this was a problem
beyond morning vomit.
Deuteronomy
I want to die on a high place
overlooking land
promised to my descendants.
I live in a basement.
I have thirty seven dollars.
Joshua
At one point
God was obsessed with dicks.
He’s chill about them now though.
I ask God why I’m circumcised.
He says “aesthetics.”
Judges
Just like a bitch
to cut the hair
where your power is stored.
Even if you’re blind
you’ll topple her temple.
You’ll hear her legs crush.
Ruth
You make me believe
in other people’s
inherent right to life.
You make my tea black.
I have learned you
like your omelet
a little undercooked.
We fuck despite Hell.