Lotus House – Angel Reisch

April 11, 2026

I hadn’t ordered from Lotus House since we broke up. When I pass it I feel momentary cravings but it’s never been enough to pull me back inside.

Wouldn’t make as much sense. I like to order for two people. Most of the food would usually only be for me. She didn’t like the house chow mein so she’d only have a mouthful. It was the fried rice with duck that she enjoyed. Not to be confused with the ‘duck fried rice’ which was noticeably different and you had to make sure on the phone that they understood the dish you were going for. Like you’d be there asking them to describe the one they think you mean.

Yes, that’s the one.

It’s much closer to her house than it is to mine. You place your order, then immediately leave to go and collect it. It’s ready by the time you’ve walked there and not cold by the time you’re back.
The Chinese restaurant that my sister prefers is in a different town and doesn’t hit the spot in the same way. I mean, for one, they don’t even do the fried rice with duck dish – they’ve never even heard of it; didn’t think it was possible, can’t be done.

When I saw my ex recently at the Minerva theatre with her new boyfriend, I wondered if they ever ate at Lotus House. I wondered if it felt at all like a betrayal the first time they did it. I wondered if she’d still order the house chow mein. Would he eat it? Culinary cuckoldry
I ordered tonight.

Duck fried rice? More like Fuck, cried twice 😉

They’ve changed the recipe of the house chow mein since the last time we had it. It’s not as good now. It looks weird. I was glad. He’d never taste what I tasted.

The fried rice with duck was the same though. Delicious. All mine this time.

My fortune cookie told me he has a small dick.