unfurl

i don’t recall the armor falling off my body in

lucid stills i smile mechanically not knowing

what originally damaged me in vacant grocery

store aisles my trauma response lasted several

miles i no longer feel the blackbird’s nest in my chest

or the flare of her crest i no longer hate the men

who struck my mother i slept until mid-morning

everything i love lures me into burning buildings

shrine

                         

                 i entered a bus unstable anchored

               

     in memory the pain’s lush

                             extrasensory unable

to coax flames from embers

         most days i

                             hardly remember the fluctuating

                                    center inflamed

i was mastered

                            by a rage yet sequenced above reason  

                            i avoided mirrors in vain

my interior was like

a lodestar that would

                                    soon implode

                          i stood in the shade watching the mishap

                                       of my reflection

eyes wet

ballast

our   frames   became   sundrenched   moss

endured the   censure   of   being   tossed

into   mortal   coil   foiled   by azure   &   the

impure   thought   that we could’ve been more  

no   matter   how much   our  cups   empty we  

remain   inundated   with   ourselves